Confession

Two lost because of vanity
One saved to ease the wound
Causing five to be marooned
Leading to my crisis of sanity

Sacrifice? Yes I was willing
Her happiness would sustain
A wall for feelings I would maintain
How clueless I was now is chilling

The day of joy soon will come
When we would welcome a son
But my slide to madness had just begun
My Lord how could I be so dumb

The first two hit like a grenade
Calling forth loss twice forgotten
By an innocent completely ill-gotten
The five forlorn left utterly betrayed

Slowly fading into depression
Noone to understand my pain
Mourning under a cloud of rain
Hoping desperately for resurrection

All has led to this disclosure
All shared here anonymously
Wishing it helps even nominally
Trying everything to keep composure

Where does my help come from
It comes from the Creator of all
I trust He will hold me lest I fall
My sanity holding on by a thumb